Increase your illiteracy by 34%

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Detail from an advert on the Tube

I was first of all impressed by the one observation over a whole month in the least representative possible location leading to the claimed 34% increase in income.  But the English language also came in for some rough treatment…

rent1

So let’s see what sense we can make of this:

Unlock the potential => let us make money out of you

potential = money

premium => it will cost somebody–everybody!–dear

solutions–perhaps this is ‘lettings’ in English

guest relations => don’t let them stay long enough to acquire any rights

housekeeping => (probably) we can charge you for what we make the ‘guests’ do

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